Some days...

Most days I feel like I have things put together. Except when...
-I look around and discover that in less than 24 hours my house has gone from exceptionally clean for having two children 3 and under to piles everywhere you look.
-I take Tayvin to the dentist to find out we were actually supposed to be flossing his (incredibly soft) teeth and we will now have to put him under in order to fix his seven cavities!
-I clean out the fridge to discover food that has been in there for at least 2 months.
-I see that Tayvin's chore list I printed in November has 4 days filled out.
-I think about the 5 loads of laundry I just did 3 days ago and then think about the 5 I have to do tomorrow.
-I look at the bathtub.
-I think of hospital bills.
-I look in the mirror.
-I look at my bank account.
-I go to my basement.
-I try to find something in my basement.
-I look at my inbox that now holds over 2500 unread email messages.
-I hear my child crying in bed because he doesn't want to go to sleep by himself tonight.
-I mourn the loss of the race I SO wanted to run this year.

And then feel like maybe I am doing something right when...
-I look at the pictures on the wall of my healthy, happy, beautiful children.
-I peek into the nursery to see my angel baby wrapped up and sleeping peacefully.
-I think of the laughter and smiles I was treated with from both of my sweet boys today.
-I realize how blessed I am to have insurance.
-I think of what my amazing husband said to me yesterday.
-I remember that everything we have, we have worked for.
-I think of our 401k (22% return this year, baby!)
-I think of all the unfortunate people who don't have homes to sleep in tonight while I am in my warm, beautiful home.
-I calculate the amount of money our education has cost us and how worth it every penny has been.
-I remember the feeling of contenment we have recognized almost on a daily basis.
-I attempt to calculate the value of being flexible and just choose a different race.
-I drink a glass of clean water, and know I can drink as much as I want.
-I remember that I am sealed to my family forever and nothing or nobody can take that away from me but me.